Deja Vu

I noticed something very interesting while watching Lost the other day.

I have about as much a chance to finish my screenplay in time for Scriptapalooza as most Lost viewers have of making sense of the image above.

I also recognizes too much of myself in Lock's eyes as he stared at the image.

While I realize that the first immediate cry from my caring friends is that I need to spend less time watching Lost and more time working on my rewrites, I must say that even when writing full tilt, one must make time to watch an occassional show or film.

But I am really not writing to justify my actions. It is actually a cry for help.

Ryan - who happened to send some helpful criticism of my first draft - even cranked out a third draft of his first film. I am floundering on the second.

It all goes back to something my friend Greg told me about Hollywood. It is much easier and more preferable to sell an idea than it is to sell a completed screenplay. Maybe it is the producer in me, but I am struggling because by not defining or redefining the characters of my story, no one can claim that they don't work (current draft may never be seen in Hollywood.) The more I try and define my characters the more I dislike them.

I lie awake at night and wonder... am I just afraid to fail or succeed. Perhaps if I were a good writer I would have a drinking problem. As it is, I don't even drink - or not enough anyway. (binging on Diet Dr. Pepper has no artistic value whatsover from what I can tell.)

If I wake up tonight, I will try and read Ryan's 3rd draft and send some encouraging words. If his writing is anything like his criticism, I expect he will do well. I just wish I could take the wisdom I have received, the words that I know are true and apply them to the mess that has become my screenplay.

The image above is what I see when I think about my story. I hope that by the next time I am up to blogging about my progress that I will have something meaningful to say.

For now, I've got to find a way off the island.

M Bootles.